Vain

[Anno94]

Hoi allemaal, uiteindelijk ook een verhaal van mij. Ik zou het erg waarderen als iemand het zou willen lezen. Graag veel opbouwend commentaar op mijn Engels en the storyline op zich ook natuurlijk. Veel leesplezier, en zo niet, sorry.

A pair of emerald green dots shone scarcely visible through a three feet tall snowberry bush, motionless, only seemingly moving due to the chilly mid-fall breeze caressing the evergreen leaves of the bush into a dance.
Just a fraction of a distance away from the bush crawled some animal through the brown-coloured leaves. The layer was thick and the creature itself could only be seen in spite of the bulge and tracks it formed. The leaves crunched silently while the creature crept along, not aware of any treat in these every day conditions, at least no more than usual.
Once more a wind blow through the evergreen bush, covering up the sudden disappearance of the curious dots. A bird’s call sounded from a high tree in the distance, though no answer came. The polyphonic music came from the bird’s throat, getting higher and higher, perhaps even turning into despair whereas its surrounding remained silent, as if the other birds did feel some treat lingering the forest paths and even the trees were determined not to reveal their presence by silencing the leaves they had left.
On the ground, the animal-like creature was still crawling and crunching leaves. Once in a while it made another sound as well, a gentle nibbling sound. One might wonder whether the little creature was enjoying his food, tasting every tiny bit of it, or either dispatching it as quickly as possible in order not to lose it somehow. Well, any life form is once to face his last supper and most of them do not see it coming, a bit tragic to think about, not even being able to choose in what way to eat your last supper. Anyhow, these thoughts did not prevent the young man to release the string and have an arrow penetrating the poor creature’s spine.
It did not even squeak and the bulge moved no more.
The emerald dots had reappeared and were now focused on the immobile bulge of dead animal. Though the figure those belonged to did not immediately respond to its successful shot, it was obvious that this young man must have shot over a hundred other animals to be able to demonstrate such skill as he just did.
The young man swung the bow round his shoulder, his shiny emerald eyes still fixed on poor creature he was guilty of victimizing. Rather ordinary the young man seemed at a distance, though he might have been a little short for someone who had already past adolescence, but those eyes – looking into those eyes could drive a fainted hearted mad, wanting to weep. However, this could only occur at the young man’s will and the burden of penetrating one’s mind was so heavy that he himself was often more hurt than the sufferer.
At this moment the emeralds were still facing the bulge of leaves, the cast arrow making a forty-five degree angle with the earth. Lost all contact with the outside world, no clue what he had been doing, so the young man seemed, standing in mid-forest. But he was not alone, no, he was not.
The same chilly mid-fall breeze that had put in motion the leaves of the bush of which the man’s emerald eyes had been part not too long ago, was now blowing through the dark brown hairs the young man wore on his head. The hair was wavy, though in case it had not been at shoulder length it might as well have appeared curly.
A stumbling came from behind the young man and a terrified deer shot just past him. He did not bother to prepare his bow again but instead his pale face revealed a modest smile. In a single movement he picked his prey off the ground and came to face the direction from which the stumbling sound had come from. No sign of surprise he gave away, encountering his companion lying facedown on the layer of leaves. The tripped fellow murmured something and lifted up his head to see the dark-haired one standing on a short distance. His cheeks turned red, as far as they were not already due to the efforts in catching a nice meal for tonight.

[Anno94]

Ik dacht dat jullie Engelse verhalen leuk vonden om te lezen.

[Sabbientje]

Anno,

Het is nu eenmaal ene Nederlands forum, dus veel mensen vinden nederlands prettiger lezen.
Die post van jou is overigens ontzettende SPAM en ik wil je vragen dat in het vervolg niet meer te doen.
Als mensen willen reageren, dan doen ze dat. Als ze het niet willen, dan doen ze het niet.
Je kan door van die SPAM posten echt mensen niet zover krijgen dat ze je verhaal lezen.

[silence]

hahaha het eerste stuk was erg national geographic
na ja, niet dat dat erg is.
mooi beschreven.
geweldig engels XD ik zou geen verhaal in het engels kunnen schrijven, kan ik niet.
begrijpen en verstaan kan ik een stuk beter
bevalt me prima

voor nu weet ik niets meer te zeggen.